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by: MIKE GILBERT
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If you’ve ever seen ESPN’s Pardon the Interruption (PTI) program, you’re
familiar with the commercials for Red Stripe beer. It’s in every single
commercial break for that show, and I’ve yet to see it anywhere else.

For those who haven’t seen it, the ad campaign centers around their
spokesman, “The Ambassador,” a Jamaican dandy in a tux with tails and a
sash that says Red Stripe. The set up is that something weird/creepy
happens, and The Ambassador jumps out to boo it and praise beer.

For instance, one commercial shows a podiatrist salivating over a foot, and
our hero jumps out and says, “Boo, creepy foot doctor! Hurray, beer!” A
shot of the beer bottle is shown and we move on to a car commercial. As the
boys on PTI say, “That’s it, that’s the list.” How this is supposed to sell
beer is beyond me, although the pitch meeting must have been one helluva
party.

This got me thinking about ways in which other companies could market their
products, based on this absurd Boo/Hurray premise.


Product: Massengill Douche
Setup: Man with smeared red lips and mussed hair suddenly looks up in
shock.
Payoff: “Boo, rainbow kiss! Hurray, douche!”

Product: Skoal Original Fine Cut Smokeless Tobacco
Setup: ‘Marlboro Man’ type cowboy sits in a hospital gown on a table as
doctor looks at chest X-rays.
Payoff: “Boo, lung cancer! Hurray, dip!”

Product: Minute Maid Orange Juice
Setup: Scraggly looking pirates sitting around, bleeding from every
orifice.
Payoff: “Boo, scurvy! Hurray, OJ!”

Product: Chico’s Bail Bonds
Setup: Any episode of Cops that doesn’t involve a shirtless redneck.
Payoff: “Boo, racial profiling! Hurray, bail!”

Product: AFLAC insurance
Setup: Old woman eating cat food stares longingly at empty pill bottle.
Payoff: “Boo, Medicare donut hole! Hurray, supplemental insurance!”

Product: Oceanspray Cranberry Juice
Setup: Perky young blonde squirms uncomfortably on a chair
Payoff: “Boo, urinary tract infection! Hurray, cranberry juice!”

Product: Home Depot
Setup: Suburban white guy, fed up with gardening, drives to Home Depot to
pick up several Mexican day laborers from parking lot
Payoff: “Boo, manual labor! Hurray, immigration!”

Product: Captain Morgan’s rum
Setup: Some random shots of spring break shenanigans and nudity.
Payoff: “Boo, true love waits! Hurray, rum!”

Product: Trojan Condoms
Setup: Former NBA All-Star Sean Kemp trying to referee a dispute between
several of his 9 illegitimate children.
Payoff: “Boo, bastards! Hurray, condoms!”


Feel free to chip in with your favorites.
And just to head you off at the pass: “Boo, unfunny writer! Hurray,
Napalm!”

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SHIRT OF THE MONTH
Shirt of the Month

We Coulda Had Him Tee

"Hey, man, we coulda had him. Hey! We coulda had him, man!"
"I will fire when I'm goddamn good and ready! You got that?!"

Look At My Striped Shirt - The Book
COMMENTS  1-10 out of 11 Post Comment Message Board View
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1 2  Next Page >
dave Sir () Post #: 1
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Posted: 11/10/2006 9:06:16 AM
"Boo, scurvy! Hurray, OJ!”

Awesome.
Nate Sweet () Post #: 2
Posts:
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Posted: 11/10/2006 9:34:37 AM
Product: Waffle House
Shot of a closed bathroom door with horrifying grunts and groans
Boo Denny's shits, horray Waffle House Heartburn

Product: Grape Vodka
Setup: Striped Shirt guy finally finds a skank to talk to him, but she isn't drunk enough to screw him.
Payoff: Boo Blueballs, hurray Grape Bombs!

Product: weed
Setup: 2 hungover room mates staring at a TV that's turned off
Payoff: Boo boring Sundays, hurray weed!


Milton Scury () Post #: 3
Posts:
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Posted: 11/10/2006 2:02:01 PM
is fixed with Lemons and Lime's. They're anti-scorbutic

Aside from that this sucked.

Boo, shitty read! Hooray happy hour.
Christine I'm so sorry () Post #: 4
Posts:
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Location:  n/a
Posted: 11/10/2006 2:24:22 PM
But I couldn't read this. My eyes were there but my heart wasn't in it. I will read it later though I promise.

I second Milton's call for happy hour. This has been the shittiest week of any week in the history of weeks.
KillTV Shitty ad () Post #: 5
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Posted: 11/12/2006 12:15:54 PM
"Boo, ads with blacks that make fun of, and humiliate Whites!! Hurray,ads that make fun of, and humiliate blacks!!!!"

I'll never buy any Budweiser beers because of that shit.
anon none () Post #: 6
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Posted: 11/12/2006 5:48:44 PM
you wonder how this ad sells beer, but wrote an entire piece based on it

must be a pretty effective ad to get in your head like that
Scartown wow. () Post #: 7
Posts:
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Posted: 11/12/2006 6:22:20 PM
This article was terrible.
Are you in any sort of way related to anyone on the staff of TPP?
My cat could write a better article, and I dont even have one.
Boo shitty articles.
bec gay..... () Post #: 8
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Posted: 11/12/2006 10:23:52 PM
this article is the reason why i support abortion...................
numnut Boo KillTV commenter () Post #: 9
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Posted: 11/13/2006 12:00:12 PM
Boo KillTV commenter.
Hurray hell for racist white assholes!
Hooray S&M Not your best work () Post #: 10
Posts:
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Location:  n/a
Posted: 11/13/2006 1:36:06 PM
Yo man, I been readinig you for a while and thi was defnitely not ur best work. I guess dey can't all be winners Sparky. Boo T.O., Hoory iggles!!
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