Use the form at the right to log in for more options.
Oh man. How did I talk myself into this? This was not a good idea.
What am I supposed to be doing right now? Should I be doing something? She looks pretty occupied currently. She’s already handling three dudes. I guess I’ll just stand here and stroke it some more. Keep your head together Mike. Your time will come. Man this gangbang is awkward!
This seemed like it would be awesome. It always looked so cool in the videos. But all this waiting and watching is really uncomfortable.
I figured I’d just sort of fall into a natural rhythm and find my groove, but I’ve gotta admit that I am really perplexed as to the proper gangbang protocol here.
Whoa. She just looked at me. Does that mean she wants me to come up there so she can suck me off? Maybe that’s what she's indicating. But what if she didn’t mean that? What if I go up there and shove my junk in her face and she doesn’t want anything to do with it? I’d look like a real horse’s ass then. I’d better just wait here.
Man this guy’s taking a long time. Come on dude, who are you trying to impress here? There are other guys waiting.
Look at that guy’s penis! It’s way bigger then mine. Thicker at least. I hope I don’t have to follow him. She won’t even know I’m in there.
Oh man, he caught me staring at it. Well that’s just great. Now he’s gonna think I’m queer. I’m not queer man. I’m just a little self conscious. God this is awkward.
It’s too hot in here.
These guys are all saying sexy things to her. I’m the only one who’s not talking dirty. I should say something so that they don’t think I’m lame. Here goes....
“Yeah, you like that bitch!”
Shit. That was stupid. Now everyone’s looking at me like I’m some misogynistic asshole.
I am an asshole. Why did I have to say the most cliché, demeaning thing I could think of? Like I need to remind her that she “likes that”. Smooth move dumbass.
I wonder why she’s doing this. I’ll bet she had a bad childhood. She probably lacked a strong paternal figure in her life.
Damn it. Now I’m half mast. Now I look like the guy that can’t keep it up. Concentrate Mike. Stop psychoanalyzing and keep your mind on the sex.
Okay here we go, that guy’s done. About time. Should I go now? I’ve waited long enough, I’m going in there.
Damn it. The Italian guy beat me to it. I was here way before the Italian guy. How are we determining who’s turn it is here anyways? Was there some sign up sheet I missed or something? Damn it.
Steady Mike old boy. There’s plenty for everyone. Just wait it out. Deep breaths.
I hope no one tries to go anal when I’m taking my turn. I’m not real cool with my stuff touching another guy’s stuff. And I think that would be unavoidable. That would be really awkward.
Something in here stinks. Is that me? I hope it’s not me. Oh man, I hope it’s not her! Wait, no, it’s the Italian guy. Thank God.
Okay, time to make your move Mike. I’ve gotta get in there and mix it up. Other wise I’m that creep at the gangbang who’s just watching and beating off. You’ve gotta be in it to win it. Okay here goes.
Wait, what’s going on? Everyone’s finishing off on her! We’re climaxing already? We just got started! I haven’t even gone yet!
Okay stay calm Mike. No one knows that. Just finish yourself off so that you’re not the odd man out.
Well this was great. This was just great. A red letter day in my sad sexual history. And what am I supposed to do now? Do we all hang around for a while and talk about it? Where should I clean up?
In regards to the photos, Mike actually included some very explicit photos with this article, but as the majority of our readers are at work, I decided something a little tamer was in order. After all, if you all get fired from your jobs for looking at porn, that wouldn't be good for us either.
As far as finding a photo like that... Google's image search is an amazing tool.
Brenda Della Casa
I Think That's My Mom...
()
Post #: 22
Posts: Rank: n/a Joined:
n/a
Location:
n/a
Posted: 4/22/2005 7:08:55 PM
Mike-
Your work never fails to entertain. You are a GREAT writer and I loved this--however, for you bitches trying to get me involved in the penile slip-n-slide action--show some respect--I belong to Pacino.
Joseph The Real Father Of Jesus
Filthy
()
Post #: 23
Posts: Rank: n/a Joined:
n/a
Location:
n/a
Posted: 4/22/2005 9:49:19 PM
I did almost get fired because of the photo the you did post. My boss was not pleased to see me sitting at my desk staring at this picture. You should add looking at porn on the Phat Phree to your ways to get fired list.
Tim the Tiny
PG13?
()
Post #: 24
Posts: Rank: n/a Joined:
n/a
Location:
n/a
Posted: 4/23/2005 4:52:42 PM
Is the guy on the far left pregnant?
Rickman
Seriously
()
Post #: 25
Posts: Rank: n/a Joined:
n/a
Location:
n/a
Posted: 4/23/2005 5:11:35 PM
Have you ever been to gang bang before? It's not that awkward at all.
Rookie
Sally
your junk touching his junk
()
Post #: 26
Posts: Rank: n/a Joined:
n/a
Location:
n/a
Posted: 4/24/2005 1:50:49 AM
When I watch gang bang porn, double P is always my favorite part because you don't want to watch dudes acting gay, but when the front of their cocks rub against each other I bet that feels really good, and they have to pretend that it doesn't and that they aren't digging some other dudes trunk stroking theirs.
This post was the funiest yet. Thanks Mike.
e40
Great Article
()
Post #: 27
Posts: Rank: n/a Joined:
n/a
Location:
n/a
Posted: 4/25/2005 1:00:33 PM
As veteran of the illicit gangbangs, I could not have asked for anything more fucking funny. And where did you get a picture of my girlfriend?
Buzzweiser
Thats me dammit
()
Post #: 28
Posts: Rank: n/a Joined:
n/a
Location:
n/a
Posted: 4/25/2005 4:47:55 PM
Mike, Why did you paste someone else's head on my body? Sincerely, Paris Hilton
Alan Rucker
Alan Rucker
()
Post #: 29
Posts: Rank: n/a Joined:
n/a
Location:
n/a
Posted: 4/26/2005 12:45:25 AM
You're telling me this gangbang was awkward . . . .. I had to pick up the photos from Walgreens. You should have seen the film guy smile at me.
kelly
hilarious
()
Post #: 30
Posts: Rank: n/a Joined:
n/a
Location:
n/a
Posted: 4/26/2005 2:37:49 PM
Those guys all look like wannabe porn stars. What a bunch of pervs! I love it.
Use the form at the right to log in for more options.
Posts: 
