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There's more than just porno hidden in the far reaches of the magazine rack, their's a whole world of niche-market magazines that you never knew existed. Here's a few of them:
Party Guitarist - A magazine dedicated to guitarists who only play at parties for female attention. Features all the latest complete John Mayer and Jack Johnson tabs, plus learn how to play the intros to today's most popular college rock songs, because you don't need to know the whole song to impress everyone!
Cat Media - We've put all the latest cat-related pictures and videos found on the internet in one convenient place. Because you don't have time to be scouring the web for your adorable feline fix! Be sure to join the companion web site, free with subscription! Subscribe meow!
Chip-Hop - A hip-hop lifestyle magazine for white guys. You don't live in a white neighborhood, so how are you supposed to keep up with the ever-changing urban culture? Let Chip-Hop be your guide, B!
Mention Music - Learn only what you absolutely need to know about today's popular music. The art of music is no concern of yours, to you it's just fuel for hipster conversation. With a subscription to Mention Music you'll know the flavor of the month, one month before everyone else! It's like Cliff's Notes for SPIN.
Mom's Boyfriend Magazine - It's not uncommon, we've all dated a woman with kids and we all know that if her kids don't like you, it's not going to last. This monthly magazine will show you how you can better "relate" to her adolescent son so you can spend more time with his mom.
Obsessive-Ex Monthly - Helpful articles for the unstable dumpee. Tips on effective stalking and "10 reasons why it wasn't your fault". This is your ultimate monthly guide to passive-aggressive revenge!
Message Boarder Monthly - Maybe you work a boring desk job, maybe you're socially inept, whatever the reason, you can't pull yourself away from the boards! Every issue includes an updated glossary. Don't be a fucktard n00b, subscribe today!
Community College Life - Hey, it's not all hacky sack circles and bake sales. This is real college and it's real hard. Let Community College Life be your escape. Includes loads of humorous essays and informative articles like "How To Get That Woman In Your Evening English Class To Stop Bringing Her Kids".
Posts: 1476 Rank: 17 Joined:
12/7/2006
Location:
savannah, GA
Posted: 4/16/2007 10:04:08 AM
it wasn't great, but it wasn't awful. plus, the community college bit was nailed. as was the 'message boarder', as is plainly witnessed by our friend, balls....what a fucking lameass guy. posting a meaningless pool of drivel on a chatboard. pathetic. you should get a job letting people punch you in the face for money, balls.
Posts: 1714 Rank: 9 Joined:
3/13/2007
Location:
Denver, CO
Posted: 4/16/2007 10:33:42 AM
Haha I love the Party Guitar one, thats so sad its true. There was always one of these asshole that shows up at college parties trying to impress girls. The sad part is they are usually terrible and cant play anything other than a 3 chord progression.
Usually I ignore these fools but I remember at one party in college some tool was pulling this acting like he was the shit, bragging about how good he was an stuff. He played the intro to stairway and then stopped. When everyone asked him to play the rest he said it was impossible to play the whole thing on his acoustic but he could play it perfectly on his electric. At this point I was pretty drunk and had seen enough. I had to ask him to borrow his guitar to try it out and with a snicker he handed it to me expecting me to make him look good. I played the entire song, including solo, and then handed his guitar back to him and told him the problem was his lack of skill, not the guitar. With a smile I then proceeded to stumble back to the keg. The sound of those people laughing at the kid was priceless. He didnt play another song the rest of the night.
Moral of the story: If you're going to try and be the guitar casanova and brag about your skills, make sure there isn't someone at the party a hell of a lot better than you.
is a damn fine periodical. It has saved my ass many times while trying to keep up with the "cool" kids at the water cooler. And anyone I see reading Party Guitar gets their guitar smashed over their head followed by a swift kick to the groin.
I agree with Ant, not awful but not great. More description and and actual article would have been nice.
Balls, don't feel bad that a creepy white guy is raising your kids. Shit happens.
Posts: 915 Rank: 7 Joined:
12/7/2006
Location:
Rock Hill (sucks), SC
Posted: 4/16/2007 12:15:02 PM
But this would have been better as a weekly. Then each week we get a single asinine fake mag highlighted with article summaries and leading advertisement samples. ...but maybe that's too much work.
But it's ok Tim Jews. I'm glad you got to rub one out during hbo's soft core 2 hour sunday night block instead of making this better.
Also, the the chick in black on the "community college life" mag looks like she's been sexually abused since preschool; and sorta like my cousin.
Posts: 3005 Rank: 6 Joined:
12/7/2006
Location:
New York, NY
Posted: 4/16/2007 12:21:55 PM
Ok, so I confirmed with my brother that the people on the cover of "Mom's Boyfriend" are who I thought they were, They'e been to my house. I'm freaking out here.
TMAN - you telling that story makes you almost as bad as them.
Antony - not you too! Everyone is turning on me!!!!
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