Posts: 0 Rank: 988
Member Since:
10/21/2005
Location:
Oakland, CA
Posted: 8/31/2007
Good morning, children. Welcome to your first day of kindergarten. Boy, there sure are a lot of you, aren't there. Say, just to get things started, I'd like to take a moment and get to know you all a little bit. First, please raise your hand if your birthday is in June, July, or August.
Okay, I guess I might as well explain why that is. You see, about six years ago, some people did a very bad thing, and it made everyone in the country very afraid and forced them to think about what they ...
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Posts: 838 Rank: 1 Joined:
12/7/2006
Location:
Seattle, WA
Posted: 8/31/2007 5:40:40 AM
A couple years ago a tertiary ‘friend’ cock-blocked me. If there is one thing you need to know about me is that I hold a grudge like a motherfucker.
Well tonight, at the bar, this ‘friend’ is hitting on this ‘girl’. Now I say ‘girl’ because I happen to know that the ‘girl’ he is hitting on is a Thai male to female transgender because he/she came into my ER.
This ‘chick’ is all over his nuts, and he looks as happy as a pig in shit. They started making out in the bar. Graphically. His tongue is down her throat like a thirsty Rottweiler slurping from a toilet bowl. It was like porno with clothes on. Disgusting.
They went home together. I can’t wait to hear what happens.
Posts: 452 Rank: 28 Joined:
4/23/2007
Location:
Jackson, MI
Posted: 8/31/2007 8:18:41 AM
The beauty of living in a backwards town like mine is that there is only one public trany and he does not even try hard. This he/she walks the streets in clothes that are too small for his fat ass, the wig is never in place, the make up never looks right, he has 5 o clock shadow, and does not even try to change his deep-as-the-ocean voice.
All in all, a sexy beast.
P.s. I agree with Muenster, The article blew donkey dong.
this was actually pretty good. Vert, since you are the local statistician, what percentage of my posts start or end with "fuck you all"? Any estimate? That's why I'm beloved, well that and the fact that I get more poon than the rest of ya.
Oh, one quick other thing, I just did my auction draft last night. I will never, with the exclusion of TPPFF, do a non-auction draft again. It was too much fun. It's the pure joy of gambling and bluffing mixed in with fantasy analysis and talking shit on your friends. You really can manipulate people. I made one of my buddies pay 48 dollars in a 100 cap league for Stephen Jackson. Yes, he's good, but that's more than LT went for. I just knew I could force it and he wouldn't quit.
Posts: 1542 Rank: 6 Joined:
12/7/2006
Location:
New York, NY
Posted: 8/31/2007 10:20:49 AM
I thought this was pretty good. I wonder how they'll spin the 9/11 attacks to the youth of tomorrow. All I know is when I've been down to Ground Zero I feel like stabbing every person I see with the "9/11 was an inside job" t-shirts and pamphlets. Sometimes I wish treason was still punishable by death.
Posts: 2831 Rank: 2 Joined:
12/7/2006
Location:
Philadelphia, PA
Posted: 8/31/2007 10:30:38 AM
I thought it was pretty funny, but then again, I once laughed at Mako.
Speaking of tppff, who is everyone hoping to get? I'll tell if you tell.
My roommate's pathetic excuse for a boyfriend gave me some pointers. then he asked me who I was in a ff league with and I said, "some of my friends" and he named a bunch and I said, "nope, none of them". finally my roommate said, "probably her weird internet friends". I'm mortified.
I'm a little insulted that I call Toque almost every time I'm drunk and he never calls me. DOes this mean that he only answers my calls out of pity?
Posts: 452 Rank: 28 Joined:
4/23/2007
Location:
Jackson, MI
Posted: 8/31/2007 10:33:05 AM
"I feel like stabbing every person I see with the "9/11 was an inside job" t-shirts and pamphlets" "Sometimes I wish treason was still punishable by death."
Damn balls, If I was gay I would gotten engaged to you instead. That was a beautiful thing to say. It touched me deep inside!
Posts: 260 Rank: 26 Joined:
5/31/2007
Location:
Gilbert, AZ
Posted: 8/31/2007 11:09:13 AM
Talk about a defeatest article... nothing like brightening up your Friday morning than an article that hits on 9/11 kids and the terrible state of our education system. If the teacher would have ended up touching one of the children at the end - this could have been a real knee-slapper!
Posts: 2831 Rank: 2 Joined:
12/7/2006
Location:
Philadelphia, PA
Posted: 8/31/2007 11:11:57 AM
on this site. They never make me laugh. But I will say that there is no way that our country was not in some way involved with 9/11. Its impossible. I would never wear a fucking tee shirt to the site where thousands of americans died, but I do believe that we were involved.
Ever since I saw Swordfish, and I know its only a movie, but all idea come from somewhere and I would not be surprised if our government did have some kind of inhouse terrorist system.
I also know 100% that flight 93 did not crash, but was shot down, which is also constantly denied.
Posts: 2047 Rank: 5 Joined:
2/27/2007
Location:
Ventura, CA
Posted: 8/31/2007 11:16:00 AM
I swear to God Almighty, if one of you fucks even utters the word "conspiracy" I will stalk, rape, skin and eat every one of your family members.
Christine - The #1 picks for FF are obvious. It's just a matter of getting the luck of the draw. We all know everyone wants LT as a RB, Manning as QB, Gould as a kicker, etc. It's the second picks that are important because chances are pretty good that you won't get first pick of all the positions. You gotta know where the hidden talent is at. That's the secret.
p.s. I swear an oath to the ancient god, Baal, that if anyone takes my Bears defense, I will devote my entire life to slaughter of everyone you have ever loved.
Posts: 452 Rank: 28 Joined:
4/23/2007
Location:
Jackson, MI
Posted: 8/31/2007 11:18:53 AM
But some fuckers take it too far. It's all propaganda, good and bad on both sides. But I think most people here need to go spend some time in a 3rd world contry to realize how fucking good you have it here. Quit fucking bitching and believe in everything: Your government, Santa, and the fucking egg-laying bunny!
Posts: 2831 Rank: 2 Joined:
12/7/2006
Location:
Philadelphia, PA
Posted: 8/31/2007 11:21:46 AM
You were supposedly in the military. You're gonna tell me that you can't imagine any of that shit happening? or our you just still brainwashed?
whatever, I will not win this argument because there are too many of you soldiers and southerners. I take it back. 9/11 happened because of some good ole fashioned hard work and planning of the arabs.
Posts: 2047 Rank: 5 Joined:
2/27/2007
Location:
Ventura, CA
Posted: 8/31/2007 11:30:44 AM
In all honesty, I believe we, the USA, could do anything we want to, including 9/11, but we didn't.
Why is it so hard to believe that some radical terrorists planned to hijack two planes and crash them?
It doesn't take a superpower nation to help you with that plan. Loose Change and all it's clones is nothing but clever editing mixed in with eery sound bites. Don't believe the hype.
I still love you and masturbate to your avatar on a weekly basis...
Posts: 2831 Rank: 2 Joined:
12/7/2006
Location:
Philadelphia, PA
Posted: 8/31/2007 11:33:02 AM
High officials in our government had something brewing overseas for more reasons than just oil. For several reason and needed an excuse to get the country behind them, especially after the whole clinton sex debacle and the feeling that the country did not care about anything anymore.
I think there was a general consensus of "if you want to make an omelette, you have to break some eggs". its a horrible thing to say, but I believe it with all my heart. It may not be able to be traced back to anyone, but in some way, even in its smallest measure, the usa was involved in the planes flying threw those buildings.
Oh look! two men in suits want to talk to me. fucking patriot act.
Posts: 2047 Rank: 5 Joined:
2/27/2007
Location:
Ventura, CA
Posted: 8/31/2007 11:37:13 AM
Do you get all your news from the Daily Show? Just asking.
Bah, enough about this crap. Let's drink and be merry. Like I stated yesterday, I NEVER drink coffee, but for some reason, I drank a bunch of it yesterday. I couldn't sleep for shit last night. Now I need more because I am tired. It's a vicious cycle.
I love getting in heated arguments with knuckleheads that defend Bush like he was Jesus Christ. Every fuck up after 9/11 I blame on him.
Was the US complicit in the actual act? That I don't know, but I do know the Bush family is so far up the Saudi Royal families ass you can just make out the bottom of their shoes.
For all you folks that blame Katrina on the people that live there. You need to get educated. That was fucking disgraceful and we should all be ashamed. 1,600 fucking people died in that storm. Last time I checked that's alot.
