Posts: 0 Rank: 2097
Member Since:
11/14/2005
Location:
Minneapolis, MN
Posted: 11/28/2005
I fucking hate you.
I mean it, I feel ridiculous. Get it off.
Lady, just because your boyfriend doesn’t want to settle down, doesn’t mean you should pretend that I’m a real baby in hopes that he’ll play along in your twisted game of “house”. I promise you’re scaring him off, and it makes you look insane. Think about it, you dress me like a Gap employee and tote me around like a damned fashion accessory. It’s disgusting, and you need to get your shit straight. Meantime, you can stop force-feeding me Altoids, yo...
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I am so guilty! Little Tony Montana wears a pink Hat whenever I decide he is gay.
Great piece :)
Bill
Loved It
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Posted: 11/28/2005 9:15:49 AM
Just saw a few of these small victims at the mall this weekend.
Eugene
Funny shit
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Posted: 11/28/2005 9:56:35 AM
Based on the title, I thought this was going to be some trite, unoriginal bullshit, but it wasn't. It was fucking funny. Some great lines. Branda Bella La Gosi, why am I not surprised that you mutilate your fucking mut? Is it because you worship at the alter of that disgusting, shallow whore Paris Hilton? I think so.
Bill
Funny, but...
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Posted: 11/28/2005 10:00:38 AM
it's "pique coat" you dumb shit, not "pea coat." I mean seriously, the article was funny, but you're just flaunting your stupidity.
Brenda Della Casa
Eugene
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Posted: 11/28/2005 10:17:29 AM
Believe it or not, I don't like Paris, but yes, as you have so kindly pointed out in post-after-post, I am the girlie-girl type to dress my dog. I'm sure your owner dresses you up too, no?
Eugene
Brenda
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Posted: 11/28/2005 10:31:19 AM
That last line was funnier than anything you have ever written. Maybe you should just stick to razzing your detractors, eh sweetheart?
Mike S
Pique
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Posted: 11/28/2005 10:51:20 AM
And Pique is pronounced Pee-Kay. I have seen a lot of dickheaded incorrect correctors on this site, but you Bill have taken the cake.
CD
"Pee Kote"?
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Posted: 11/28/2005 11:31:47 AM
Bill, congrats on winning the dumbass award on a Monday. Well done.
Dustin Ortmann
Hey Bill...
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Posted: 11/28/2005 12:02:51 PM
give my balls a mouth hug...dickface!
deuce
justin
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Posted: 11/28/2005 12:34:20 PM
"gayest sweater since the cosby show"
hands down the funniest thing ever written. hands down.
Soylent Green
I can still picture...
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Posted: 11/28/2005 12:53:49 PM
the French poodle wearing a beret and calling this poor little guy gay; GENIUS!
Julie
nice
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Posted: 11/28/2005 12:58:21 PM
Thanks for a funny article on Monday!
And, coming from a girl who writes articles about US weekly and gets lovingly made fun of...any boy that knows the difference between pea and pique coat should never tell anyone. As far as you are concerned, it is pea. That is just taking it too far.
I call it a pea coat, and I love it.
Julie
Joe Kickass
heh
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Posted: 11/28/2005 1:26:39 PM
His last name is wood.
Good article. Bill, you just got skeeted on by half the board, go clean yourself up.
Christine
. . . . .
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Posted: 11/28/2005 1:36:07 PM
Great article Justin. The title was the best part because the dog in picture looks like that is exactly what he is thinking. Great job.
I think the most embarrassing moment in history has happened today. Bill tried to the correct somone, but was completely fucking wrong. Take a moment to let that sink in people. Pique, hahahahaha. I just blew a funny fuse. I am mortified for him. Seriously, my cheeks are blushing.
tah
Do you live...
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Posted: 11/28/2005 1:40:06 PM
in NYC? It says you live in Minneapolis but do they have those chicks there too?
The Phat Phree's Other Justin
Sweet Potatoes
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Posted: 11/28/2005 1:59:24 PM
Wood is a way better last name than mine, plus you're funny. I wonder if Charlie brought you in to replace me? That's the problem with a 'virtual boss' that uses a Chuck Norris photo as an avatar, you never can get a good read on him. Regardless, Welcome To The Terrordome, kid. Keep the good shit coming.
Cameron
Moment of Silence for bill
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Posted: 11/28/2005 3:04:57 PM
It is true that Bill got logged on to the site today, saw what he thought was a mistake, and was all over it like Eugene at a truckstop bathroom in front of a glory hole. For that, he is idiot of the day (Bill, not Eugene). Seriously though, how many losers log onto this site everyday and throw out some insults because an author uses the wrong verb tense? Bill is just one of many.
Eugene
Cameron
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Posted: 11/28/2005 3:13:56 PM
Thanks for calling me out asshole...who are you again? Is this your first comment? If so, I welcome you to the ranks of dipshits who post worthless shit all day long. Yes, I'm not onlly a client of that foundation, I'm also the pesident. Or is it the other way around?
"I'm not only a client, I'm the playapresident"
I'll go with Biggie.
Christine
I agree Cameron
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Posted: 11/28/2005 3:14:32 PM
But those other losers who correct verb tenses and shit do not really count. I mean its a dick move, but at least their corrections are right. BILL, thought his comment was going to be awesome. Like we were all going to read and say, "DAAAAMN, Bill just wrecked the author, ooooohhhhhh snap!!!" There is nothing lower than that. Nothing.
Brenda Della Casa
Bill, Welcome
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Posted: 11/28/2005 3:27:17 PM
To My World :)
Wayne
Awesome
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Posted: 11/28/2005 3:58:37 PM
This is great, I cant wait to see more of your work. My only hope is that their owners at least share some of the drugs they are on with their pooch.
Top five on your first one, not too shabby!
Tinkerbell
Very Funny and...
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Posted: 11/28/2005 4:15:57 PM
Great piece. Very funny. I can totally relate. Whenever Paris dresses me up in those fucked up outfits I want to bite her on her ass. Well at least my sweaters are from Neiman. I may look like a freak but at least I am a well dressed freak.
Oh, Christine, are you really Wendy the Retard from the Howard Stern Show? You write like she speaks. Just curious.
Christine
Yes
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Posted: 11/28/2005 4:33:02 PM
I am her.
deuce
tinkerbell - 2 problems
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Posted: 11/28/2005 4:42:24 PM
1. you ripped off the very well done article. and you sucked at it.
2. you know a character from "the howard stern show" other than howard stern.
April
Justice
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Posted: 11/28/2005 6:38:16 PM
Just talking about the 'little Louie Vuitton dogs' the other day with a friend; we decided that anybody that does that to their dog will doom themselves the same fate in their next life. Justice served.
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