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12/4/2005
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Posted: 5/2/2005
It's On!
Hey buddy. I see you’re checking out those Cool Whip containers huh? You've got a good eye my friend. No? You weren’t? Well that’s too bad. A fella could keep pretty much anything he wants in those. It’s just like Tupperware really. Same thing. But that’s cool. It’s your loss. Just keep looking. I’m sure you’ll find something you want to buy at my Shitty Garage Sale.
Do you like clothes? Looking to update the old wardrobe a bit? Well you came to the right place my friend. How ...
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The worst is the lady that looks at your old chia pet as if it's covered in dog piss then trys to make a lowball offer to take it of your hands.
worse then that is the guy who refuses to take any lowball offers even though we all know what you cant sell at a garage sale gets thrown away.
Greart artical Polk.
TheVic
Holy Hell
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Posted: 5/2/2005 10:00:57 AM
I just played golf on Sat, first time doing anything active, and my abs are really sore. It kind of made laughing my ass off to this column hurt.
Good day
Steve
Nice
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Posted: 5/2/2005 10:38:25 AM
Very good stuff Mike, you never dissappoint.
Janis
so true
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Posted: 5/2/2005 12:39:12 PM
This is right on the money.
Jack
good article
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Posted: 5/2/2005 12:57:04 PM
How much for the clock decorated with sea shells?
steve
everyone in their 20's should remember this code for life
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Posted: 5/2/2005 2:01:27 PM
There's no way that NES would last at garage sale. I'll bet if you would've have Contra with it, that fucker would've sold. UUDDLRLRBABASelectStart !!!! BOO-YAH...30 lives, bitch. Sorry aliens in the game, you lose.
Margaret
Cassingle
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Posted: 5/2/2005 2:05:03 PM
Do you have any Air Supply cassingles available? Because if so, then you've got yourself a deal!
Jackal
YES!
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Posted: 5/2/2005 2:08:57 PM
Steve, I thought my cousin and I were the only ones that remembered the code to Contra. There really are people as dorky as me out there. Scary.
Snowman
Rubix Cube
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Posted: 5/2/2005 2:09:32 PM
Things I witnessed at garagae sales: - a guy trying to talk another go down on a rubix cube missing 4-5 sticker colors from $1.50 to $1 -two old ladies cursing each other out over the ugliest curtains I have ever seen. Apparently the Curtain rods were sold seperately, even though they were attached -A guy getting caught stealing womens clothes cause he apparently was to shy to buy them for himself. -A women use a mens electric shaver on her face to see if it actually worked.
Great post, nothing like watching poor people that can't afford real clothes and other crap, trying to spend their wellfare money on some old clock made of sea shells.
Matt S.
Perfect
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Posted: 5/2/2005 2:20:57 PM
Great article Polk. I'm hooked on this site now.
Cassie
Awesome
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Posted: 5/2/2005 2:37:02 PM
I have been waiting for someone to rip on these tools!! Those who hold garage sales are worse than those that shop at them. You can't feel sorry for some ass wipe that actually tries to make a buck on his 10 year old dish set.
Chris Matthews
To TheVic
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Posted: 5/2/2005 3:19:55 PM
Worst syntax ever. Unclear referent. Please revise and re-post.
This weekend, the little lady wanted to go to a neighborhood garage sale (the worst kind), and we took the dog. Everybody was cooing at the dog until he shit in the yard. He has the right idea. I just wish he would've shit in the garage.
Steve
To TheChrisMatthews
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Posted: 5/2/2005 3:48:46 PM
Chris Matthews, You wrote:
"Worst syntax ever. Unclear referent. Please revise and re-post"
go back to correcting your 3rd Grade Judy Blume book reports, you failure.
dan
correction for steve
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Posted: 5/2/2005 7:43:15 PM
the contra code only requires "BA" to be hit once, not twice.
Good article, Polk.
steve
Damn you Dan
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Posted: 5/3/2005 3:00:43 PM
You are not correct. You should be ashamed of yourself for not knowing the correct code; unless, you're in your teens and you're a hippy and just started playing NES because it's "vintage." Then, I'll forgive you.
RC
Garage Sales Suck $$$
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Posted: 5/3/2005 3:32:01 PM
"Unfair to payor but not to payee"...(Spaceballs).
What is eBay but a garage sale with exhorbitant mark-ups? You could seriously buy crap at a garage sale and auction it for 10x on eBay. Just imagine, Snowman, those two grandmas not fighting over the ugly curtains, but rather out-bidding each other!
I give stuff every year to my in-laws to sell at their sale...no sitting around on my part and at the end of the day I'm usually $200+ richer.
P.S. I love the garage sales where the "collector" is selling off 50 years of Penthouse magazines. The only thing "collecting" is the stuck-together pages of Miss October!
PowerUp
"Konami Code"
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Posted: 5/3/2005 3:33:59 PM
Up Up Down Down Left Right Left Right B A gets you 30 lives at start-up. Also make sure you have the spread gun when you get to the end of Base 1. It makes it a lot easier to destroy the guns pointed at you.
Tom A
How Much You Asking
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Posted: 5/3/2005 3:47:42 PM
for that Sit 'N Spin?
GN
YEAH!
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Posted: 5/3/2005 4:01:09 PM
Aw man, of all random elements floating in the blogosphere, FINALLY someone mentions garage sales. Excellent start for my lunch break. Excuse me while I nuke my TasteeBite combo...
*Ding!* Ok, now I'm ready. I actually enjoyed the 3-4 years that I went to garage sales with my dad every weekend. I found some pretty cool, weird things for next to nothing out of the pocket. The only disaster and embarassment was when my dad decided to hold a garage sale himself - it literally *was* a hodge podge of useless junk that had accumulated in our garage over a decade or so (no, not the cool, weird things that I found, btw). Oh yeah, we're talking' oodles of frayed phone cords and extension cords, broken phones, miscellaneous rusted tool parts, bolts and nuts, old moldy Popular Mechanics mags, a bent bicycle rim missing spokes, shelving L-brackets, a huge (non-operating) wooden console TV, etc. So yeah, it's junk. But he was trying to pawn this stuff off for $$! Needless to say, lookieloos came and went without a sale. Wack.
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